How I Used the Wisdom of GNM to Heal a Severe Fragrence Allergy with Hollie, 164

00:00:00 Hollie: You have to find the truth of the moment. She said a lot of things, but that is the phrase that really stood out to me and the phrase that I held on to when I was ready to embark on the mission to be okay.

00:00:21 Chazmith: Hey, hey, welcome to Our Power Is Within podcast. I'm your host Chazmith, and my mission for this podcast is to inspire you to take your power back, to realize that you are the healer that you have been looking for all along. I believe that we are all capable of healing in mind, in body, and in soul. So if you're new to the podcast, I just want to say welcome. And if you've been tuned in for a while, I also just want to say welcome back. I hope everybody is doing wonderful today. I am going to jump right into our guest. 

00:00:53 Chazmith: Our guest with us today is Hollie, and Hollie is here to share with us this amazing story about how she healed from a severe fragrance allergy, once she was able to understand the biology of the body through the wisdom of German New Medicine. With some guidance, Hollie was able to connect the dots to when her allergy first started and what the conflict or the DHS was that initiated the allergy biological program. And then through this awareness and some practice and tools that she implemented and utilized that she shares with us today, she was able to complete her healing phase and finally be sensitivity slash allergy free. 

00:01:41 Chazmith: It's such an amazing story and I'm so excited for her to share this with you all as well as all the other wonderful stuff that we dig into and talk about today. So this is a really fun one. Enjoy. 

00:02:02 Chazmith: Hollie, thank you so much for being here with me today.

00:02:04 Hollie: Hi, yeah, I'm honored to be here. Thank you for inviting me.

00:02:08 Chazmith: Yeah, I'm really excited that we're finally connecting for a little backstory for everyone listening. I heard Hollie's story on another podcast and I was so inspired by it and it like jazzed me. It lit me up. I was excited. I was like, yes, I want to share this story with all my listeners because it was a really fun one.

00:02:26 Hollie: Yeah, definitely. It's pretty unheard of. I actually, after sharing my story, heard several others like it because people reached out and said, oh, my gosh, you know, that happened to me, too. But as I experienced it, it was very mind blowing. So yeah, I guess I'll start by saying that six and a half years ago, I developed a severe fragrance allergy. My throat would close. I would constantly be on the brink of wanting to go to the ER because I just was struggling to breathe so much. I would get other little symptoms like eczema on my hands. I had a rash around my mouth. And basically at the time I was living in mold. I was living in a severely moldy apartment. 

00:03:11 Hollie: And it flooded because the bathtub above us was installed improperly. And I was also pregnant. So I didn't know about anything with mold at that time. I just trusted the maintenance crew to fix everything. And I also just, through my lens at the time, thought that everything was from being pregnant. Because people, doctors, told me, oh yeah, sometimes pregnancy turns on allergies. So that was the story that I clung to for five and a half years until I figured out the truth. And what happened is that I actually had a very shocking conflict with my mother-in-law. And my brain decided that it would latch onto fragrance as an allergen to protect me from ever being in that situation again.

00:04:06 Chazmith: Yeah, so just for a little backstory for anyone who's listening, when Hollie says she had this extreme conflict shock, this is a term that if you have been listening regularly, then you know about the German New Medicine wisdom, otherwise known as GNM or GHK. So we talk about in many episodes how there's a moment that is like a conflict shock. And at that time, the brain takes a snapshot of everything inside and all around us. And the brain can become confused as far as what the threat is. The brain just knows, oh, my gosh, I don't want to ever feel this way again. What's the cause of the problem? I need to keep us safe.

00:04:50 Chazmith: And for Hollie, the brain had decided it was fragrance. And if I remember correctly, Hollie, it's because you were in the middle of a tough conversation with your mother-in-law, who was somebody who had a lot of unnatural types of fragrances and scents either on her and around her, right? Like in her house and on her body and stuff like that.

00:05:13 Hollie: Right. So yeah, I'll go straight over to the DHS, which is the shocking conflict in German New Medicine. I was newly pregnant. I was 22 years old. It was a shock to me. And at 13 weeks, I decided to announce to everybody. And when I announced to my family and my husband's family, I was met with congratulations by everyone except my mother-in-law. And she was equally as shocked as I was. because she also had very different plans in her mind for our lives. And so she did not wish congratulations. She walked away. And a week later, we went over to their house again. And my husband and his dad were outside in the backyard. 

00:06:00 Hollie: And I was in the kitchen with my mother-in-law. And she just spun around. And out of nowhere, we always only talked about surface-level things, like small talk. And out of nowhere, she spun around and looked at me and literally just screamed. How could you be so stupid? You can't even use birth control. And as a very fragile, newly pregnant young mother who was also grieving over the fact that I was pregnant, that was very shocking. And I also realized that that moment was especially shocking to me. I realized this much later that it was especially shocking to me because of my own relationship with my mom that was troubled. 

00:06:46 Hollie: And sometimes we see that something is only traumatic to someone because of the trauma before the trauma. So for me, I had a very strange relationship with my mom, and I was looking to my mother-in-law to be my mother. And to have her reject me like that and knowing like, whoa, I'm attached to this woman for the rest of my life. And she feels that I ruined her son's life, that I took everything away from him, that it was all my fault. And the real danger there was that I believed her. And that is where my symptoms started.

00:07:25 Chazmith: Wow. Yeah. And so you though, of course, as we know, didn't know all this right away. This was like hindsight 2020, something you learned years later after going through all the suffering of this extreme sensitivity to fragrance of all sorts. And so this is something now that we're looking back in hindsight saying this is actually what happened, but at the time you didn't know that.

00:07:48 Hollie: Right. Yeah, it was super fascinating. So for five years, I clung onto the story of, you know, it's just from being pregnant and a gene turned on that created this allergy. And then I just had this memory of my mother-in-law roasting me, replaying in my head. I was ruminating on it hardcore. And then, you know, I was upset at myself for ruminating on it. I was like, whoa, I'm being so annoying. I just can't stop talking about this thing that happened five years ago. And really what it was is ruminating was another symptom that my body was saying, hey, this needs to be dealt with. And something isn't right. And so you're gonna have to figure out the truth of what happened. 

00:08:32 Hollie: And that didn't come through me alone. What happened is, as I was speaking to my husband about it, the shocking moment five years later, I had a light bulb moment that my first reaction to fragrance was the same week that she did that. And I said, it has to be related. It's got to be related. I've cleaned everything else. I've tested our house for mold. I got rid of every single thing I owned. case it was infected with mold. I bought air purifiers, I started eating the cleanest ancestral diet, you know, all of the things, and I was still having symptoms. 

00:09:10 Hollie: So I knew at that moment, I had a light bulb, I said, this is from that shocking conflict. And then I went to go search And I actually found that a local mom was really into German New Medicine. And now I'm friends with her. Her name is Hannah. She taught me that allergies can actually be caused by a shocking conflict.

00:09:33 Chazmith: So you actually had intuitively had this epiphany and connected these dots before you actually even heard of GNM or German New Medicine. But it took you five years?

00:09:44 Hollie: It took me five years. And it was five really hard years. They were pretty isolating. very, very difficult to travel, attend any sort of gathering, wedding, church, really any sort of thing. I couldn't let people hold my kids. It was a really hard time. And yeah, it was crazy that at the perfect moment, it just came to me. And I don't think I would have been ready to heal it before that moment. I think there's no point in really stressing or pressuring yourself to heal. I think that my body just intuitively was like, it's time. Like you have all the resources now. 

00:10:22 Chazmith: It's so interesting though, because yeah, there's a few things you point out that I love. One, that the healing is in divine timing, right? Everything happens when it's supposed to. And I think that's so important to highlight because I know how I've personally, after learning about GNM, put so much pressure on myself to have to find this shock conflict that's responsible for this said symptom or diagnosis. And that alone creates so much stress and pressure, right? And trusting that like, it's going to show up. 

00:11:03 Chazmith: It's another layer of trust, trusting your body, trusting your true self, trusting your intuition, and just trusting to know that the world, God, your higher self, whatever you want to address it as, has you, has your back, and that there's learning to be had in this, and that in the right timing, that's going to surface, whether it's in a dream, in a conversation, in a meditation, but that just, yeah, trusting rather than putting this constant pressure that we have to know now, you know, because we want it now in our timing. So I really love that you bring that up.

00:11:37 Hollie: Well, I mean, it goes even further because as I had this light bulb moment that it was connected, my daughter was in the same class as Hannah's daughter at gymnastics and… So I wouldn't have had Hannah who gave me the words to unlock the memory at any other point. It was maybe a month or two overlap, where our daughters were in the same class that I had that epiphany and was able to just go talk to her. This was before we were friends. And so I went to her at the gymnastics studio and I was like, Hey, can we talk about something called German New Medicine? 

00:12:19 Hollie: And I had just seen her like talk about it online. And she was like, oh, yeah, I would love to. So I start sharing about my symptoms before the conflict, she doesn't realize that I already know that the conflict is related to the symptoms. And so I list my symptoms out. And she goes, oh, yeah, that's, you know, your throat closing, that's an attack conflict, like you were or a scare, fright conflict, you were very, very scared. So scared that you probably couldn't move or speak. And I was like, yep. You know, that really went along with the DHS. And then the rash around my mouth, perioral dermatitis, that's often from someone being weaned too early. Why would an adult woman get perioral dermatitis? 

00:13:01 Hollie: Well, I felt cut off from my, not cut off from my relationship with my mother, just kind of distant. And then to have hope that this other woman may step in and be this motherly figure and then feel completely cut off from her. She actually disowned us for an amount of time because of the pregnancy. It was like I was weaned too early, right? I just got welcomed into the family and then I was let go. So my symptoms lined up perfectly and then I told her the story and she goes, there you have it. That's what it is. And I was like, okay, well, how do I fix it? 

00:13:39 Hollie: And she said, you have to find the truth of the moment. She said a lot of things, but that is the phrase that really stood out to me and the phrase that I held on to when I was ready to embark on the mission to be like, okay, I know the moment. I know the symptoms. I know it's related. Like I was 100% sure at this point, like I knew where it all came from. And I went through the memory. Every single night, I would nurse my son to sleep in a dark room. And it was like the perfect place to have this like, almost meditative journey, you know, where I was able to somatically re-enter that memory, which I don't recommend just somatically re-entering your traumatic memories. That's not my recommendation. 

00:14:23 Hollie: I had the tools at that time and the confidence where I knew it was safe for me to do. And so I went into the memory and I just looked at all the things around me. I just took in the smells, the sights, everything that was going on, how I felt, where I was standing. The words, the words that you remember verbatim from your traumatic moments are key to unlocking those memories. Your brain took those words and saved them for you for a reason. And so you have to use them. And what I did is I mentally annotated the words that really shook me. Like, she roasted me, right? But the words that really, really hurt were, how could you be so stupid that you can't even use birth control? 

00:15:11 Hollie: And I don't think those words would hurt everybody like they did me. I don't think they would cause a fragrance allergy in everybody. It was the trauma before the trauma. It was the grieving process I was in. It was the hoping she would be my mother. It was the accumulation of everything where that was the most shocking thing she could have said. And I just latched onto it and believed all the lies that are embedded in that one phrase.

00:15:37 Chazmith: Yeah. And I love that you point this out, too, because that's the other thing is often, especially if we develop like a symptom, which in GNM, we call a healing phase and onset of a healing phase. And then for you, when it becomes chronic, we know that we're like stuck in this hanging healing from a track, which is what, or triggers, which is what the allergy is essentially based off of. And we often want to think it was just that one moment, right? But the thing is, is if it started in adulthood, it's probably still stemming from something far earlier. 

00:16:14 Chazmith: Because as you said, that moment, yes, that moment was triggering, but it was only triggering to you because of your past experiences, maybe all the way back to childhood. And the beliefs, limiting beliefs and stories that you already had playing in your head like you said. Maybe somebody else who absolutely knew for certain that they were not stupid and if they were in a different position, somebody could say that to them and it would roll right off their shoulder and they'd be like, screw you, I know better. 

00:16:48 Chazmith: But she hit something that was like an area that was already, I don't want to say the word weakness, but it was already a deep insecurity for you, a deep self devaluation that you had. And that's the difference, you know? And so that's why perception is so important. So it really usually also goes back, back, back.

00:17:10 Hollie: It goes way back. Yeah. Every single one of my memories that I've sort of worked through and unlocked, I find almost like a thread that I have to go back through and untangle with a fine-toothed comb, several little memories that built up to that moment. And just like I said earlier, the key to that is finding the truth of the moment. So if you're getting lost as you're looking through, sifting through these hard times in your life, you just have to say, well, what's the truth? And sometimes it's not what you want to hear. And that's okay, because you can heal through that, too, just by realizing, okay, I found a really hard truth that was a blind spot for me. 

00:17:53 Hollie: And now, instead of holding on to it, I'm able to breathe, I'm able to cry, I'm able to experience the hardness of that truth. And you'll find healing in that as well. In my case, I separate the phrase she said to me into two different parts. So a generic, how could you be so stupid? And I went through and I just found all these memories in my life where I just really thought I was stupid. Not like, I don't know, I could do really well on a math test or something, but stupid as in like, I just made a really silly mistake or looked funny or, you know, did something embarrassing. Like times where I just felt like, wow, I was not thinking, you know? 

00:18:39 Hollie: And so I went through those memories and I found that in a lot of them, it actually wasn't stupidity. It was me growing up. It was me learning, me figuring things out that no adult stopped to teach me about. And they were all really important parts of my life to make me who I am. So I had no regrets about them after going through them, but I didn't realize how much I was just holding on to. No wonder I had a breaking point, right? And then the second part that I was able to unravel, and this was over probably a month where I just laid there every night and just kind of sifted through, and I actually felt the huge memory just dissolving. I was just untangling this massive web or knot. 

00:19:26 Hollie: The second part was, how can you be so stupid that you can't even use birth control? It was me realizing that I actually did think I was really stupid for getting pregnant. And I assumed all the blame myself. I, at that time, didn't believe in divine timing. I was too caught up in my own plans and that's okay. I didn't know, right? That also wasn't stupid of me. I blamed myself. I thought, you know, maybe I should have tracked my cycle better. You know, I felt like I should have been in control and I wasn't. And that my consequences negatively affected my husband, which looking back, he didn't. We're really happy that we had our baby. She came at the perfect time. I have absolutely no regret or grief left after rewiring this. And I don't feel stupid that I got pregnant and thought I was young and didn't plan it. 

00:20:18 Hollie: And that's not just because she's one of our greatest joys in life. That's actually the truth that I was able to find. And maybe I would have found the truth that I would have regretted it, that I wanted a different life choice and I didn't want to have her. And maybe that would have been my truth, but it didn't turn out that way. And once I got through all of that and I swapped out my core belief, I didn't just tell myself like, oh, you're not stupid. I actually swapped out my core belief and said, you are an intelligent, intuitive mother. Nobody can talk to you that way. And if they do, you need to go through and realize that it's not true. It's a lie. 

00:21:01 Hollie: And so I actually was able to just let go of my anger toward, well, I thought it was for my mother-in-law. I was actually angry at myself. That's what you find a lot of the time when you rewire. You're like, oh, wait, I wasn't actually mad at who I thought I was. I was mad at me. Yeah, it's interesting how it works out that way a lot of the time.

00:21:20 Chazmith: Yeah, it's so true. It's so often because it's something within us that we're battling or struggling with or a boundary we're not upholding. And so it's so easy to point the finger at the other person and to place judgment or blame or to feel the emotions outwardly because it's almost too intense to feel inwardly, you know, until we can realize like, oh, my gosh, no, this is, this is actually about me.

00:21:47 Hollie: Absolutely. I mean, it doesn't justify like, I would have loved to have her support. I would have loved to have her be a motherly person, right? It doesn't take that away. I had wishes. I had hopes and that's okay. But yeah, it doesn't condone what she said to me, but it really wasn't about that. And that needed to happen for me to get through my next phase of growing and healing. And I actually became a lot more resilient through that experience. And I just take every symptom and every resilience moment as a gift, you know?

00:22:23 Hollie: Even when I had a crazy rash around my mouth, I mean, it looked like eczema all around my lips. I used to think, wow, I'm so like cursed and devastated. I don't want anyone to see me, you know? And now I just think, what a gift. It actually showed me what I needed to do next in my life. And by Listening to my symptoms and figuring out what they meant, I was able to help my entire body, not just that one part of me.

00:22:54 Chazmith: Right, yeah. They were just messengers to help you just heal and evolve and grow at a soul level, to help you see something that was a blind spot that you couldn't see before. Had you not had that opportunity so young, what could life have looked like if you kept holding on to that unconscious belief for those six, seven, eight, next twenty years?

00:23:18 Hollie: Right. I do wonder that. I wonder what life would have looked like had I not gone through what I went through.

00:23:24 Chazmith: Right. You know, and another thing, too, like backtracking a little, but I do want to just highlight that I think is so important because, is the part you talked about with the ruminating. That rumination, the whole time, you say, oh, I'm beating myself up, judging myself. Why am I stuck on this? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So many of us, I know when we're doing that, we try to get out of it. We try to just stop it. We try to redirect it. We want to ignore it. Pretend it doesn't exist. Just stop it rather than actually with a curious mind looking into it because it's there for a reason. 

00:24:02 Chazmith: If we're ruminating on the same thing over and over again, there's information there, there's wisdom potential, there's power in that because it's insight into something that at a deep unconscious level is obviously a conflict that's unresolved that we're not addressing and it's right there to show us like, hey, this is unhealed. This is unhealed potential right here.

00:24:28 Hollie: Yeah, definitely. I even noticed after I figured this out, the ruminating part of it, I noticed that certain people would always appear in my dreams, like in different settings, but they would just be there a lot. And I just was able to let them go, too and be like, you know what? You're there, there in your dream over and over again because you didn't quite resolve whatever went on with them. And so I was able to go to those memories and then they actually stopped appearing again, which was like super weird. But yeah, even dreams that repeat themselves, I think have some meaning, although that can be really tricky, right? Trying to decipher dreams.

00:25:12 Chazmith: Yeah, but there's patterns. It's so interesting. We're talking about the dreams because I literally just had a coaching session a week ago with a GNM practitioner. And this is what's so funny is things can just be so in our blind spot. Despite everything I've studied and researched and known and understood, I was dealing with some symptoms, prolonged, that were becoming rather chronic. And when she first goes, oh, well, how's your home life? How's this? And I'm like, oh, it's fine. Surface level, conscious mind, it's fine. But then the more she started asking questions, all of a sudden, all this stuff came to surface. 

00:25:56 Chazmith: So what the conclusion was is my symptoms were directly related to territory, a territorial conflict. But in my conscious mind, I was just dismissing everything. I was like, oh, yeah, my territory is fine. Everything's fine. Everything's great. But the more she dug, the more it was like, oh, my God, no. Look at what your unconscious is actually like ruminating on and feeling in conflict about around your territory. Well, then, two days later, I had this massive epiphany. For the last year, I've been having these really weird dreams about peeing. 

00:26:34 Chazmith: Like pee dreams, where I have to pee really bad, just constantly I have to pee really bad, but there's nowhere for me to go, or the toilet's already overflowing, or there's no door and I'm in a public place. All these really weird, but up until that point, they felt so random, but I was always perplexed. Why do I keep dreaming about peeing? Then it was this huge light bulb moment. Peeing is about territorial marking. And so those dreams were really just insights into what was actually happening deep in my unconscious, that my conscious mind was like blocking out.

00:27:10 Hollie: Right, yeah. It takes a lot to build awareness. I don't think anyone will ever reach the full capacity of awareness, right?

00:27:18 Chazmith: Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy how even knowing the wisdom of the five biological laws, that doesn't mean we're just never going to experience a symptom again or instantly know what it is because a lot of times, to some degree, it could be something that's really just trying to keep us safe. Like maybe it feels like it's too heavy or too hard or too something based on old patterns or beliefs. So the brain's just like, I'm just going to create this symptom because I just want to keep you safe.

00:27:47 Hollie: Absolutely. Yeah, I definitely love German New Medicine because of that. Just, you can kind of not allow all symptoms to just be, but you're able to just exist and not be so consumed about fixing everything. Because really, your symptoms are just an insight into your mind and your environment. And then you can pick up on what's going on by building the awareness around, okay, how did I react when that happened? Why was that so triggering for me? How did I feel when my child did that? Why did that make me want to yell? And so as we unlock those things, we might find that they're related to our symptoms, and there's no need to suppress the symptoms. It's really just building awareness and strength.

00:28:34 Chazmith: Yeah, yeah, for sure. So now, million-dollar question, obviously, everyone's going to want to know, what happened with the allergy, this allergy that was so severe you could barely leave your house?

00:28:48 Hollie: Yeah. So basically, I finished rewiring my brain. And I didn't even realize I was rewiring my brain at that point, right? I'm just unlocking this crazy mystery that's being fed. It was like it was being spoon fed to me, right? Like life was like, here you go, like, we're gonna help you figure this out. So I felt like everything unraveled. Everything untangled. I kind of knew when it happened. It was a couple of weeks, right? So I think it was when I finally realized, okay, I wasn't stupid for being pregnant. 

00:29:23 Hollie: When I realized everything, when I saw it all at once and actually let it go, it was like I felt something physically dissolving in my brain. I don't know if it was physical or not. It may have been spiritual, but I actually felt something like relief. And then the next day, my lymph nodes swelled up like super, super big. I wasn't sick or anything. And they stayed swollen for months, which in German New Medicine is called the Syndrome. So that was like the healing after the healing. But yeah, I didn't have any fragrance in my house because I was so allergic. Even if I had toilet bowl cleaner in a container in a bathroom far away, like I would still be experiencing like eye infections, ear infections, throat swelling, like all the symptoms.

00:30:15 Hollie: So I had zero fragrance in my house, zero chemicals. And so I actually had to go somewhere. So I went to the mall. And I went into the perfume aisle of Nordstrom. 

00:30:26 Chazmith: That's bold. 

00:30:28 Hollie: I was just like, it's gone. My brain's like, it's gone. I don't know how I knew, but it just was. I haven't had a moment like that since with German New Medicine, sadly. It's not time, right? But I knew it was gone, and I went into Nordstrom, and before, that probably would have landed me in a bed for three to seven days, where I would be heavily breathing, like, almost like an asthmatic attack. And so I went there and I just started taking little breaths. And I didn't have any reaction. My nose didn't burn. My throat didn't burn. No swelling, nothing. There was nothing. And I just knew I was like, it's gone forever. 

00:31:11 Hollie: And since then, so on Freya's podcast, I said, you know, it's 100% gone. I've had no reaction. But since then, I actually did react. One time a neighbor had like the strongest fragrance you can imagine and I got like a little headache. But I want to draw like a differentiation between like fragrance sensitivity and like what I was experiencing. So mine obviously was like a very shocking conflict that created it as a protective mechanism for my body so that I wouldn't go through the trauma again. But I think I can also, and many, many people, especially people who cut fragrance out of their life, can experience sensitivity because in German New Medicine, there's the caveat that if you are malnourished, if you are poisoned, or if you have an actual accident or direct injury to the body, you can also experience symptoms even without a shocking emotional conflict. 

00:32:06 Hollie: So fragrance does fall into the category of a toxin, a poison to humans. And I think that certain chemicals that are in these can still cause other symptoms. So I've never reacted again with any of the symptoms that I had before. But since then, occasionally, if there's a really, really crazy fragrance, I'll feel like a mild headache coming on. And that I do feel is very different. Does that make sense?

00:32:35 Chazmith: Yeah. 1000%. Yeah, it is very different. And that's like, I think anything, too, is you can be sensitive to things, especially if you're not susceptible to them very often. Like now, if you were always around those fragrances again, at this point, because you did heal the allergic reaction, you would probably eventually have that little headache dull to nothing. But because if you're still choosing to live mostly holistically and not put yourself in the position of having these strong, unnatural sense, then it makes so much sense that you could still have a little minor sensitivity to it. 

00:33:16 Chazmith: But also something I learned from another GNM coach is a lot of times, too, it's our conscious perception. So if you have, in a sense, a conscious resistance, if you just literally like, oh, that is just awful. I don't like it. Then you could have a little reaction to that because you genuinely don't like it. So it's obviously just information.

00:33:39 Hollie: Oh, yeah. No, my brain is still telling me that's poison. I don't like the smell of it. It feels very strong to me. I love this little story. Can I share a little snippet about my grandpa? He was raised on a farm. And so he told me, I was telling him about everything that I've experienced and what I've just shared. And he was like, you know, I lived on a farm and whenever we would go into town, we would all be sneezing like crazy and having symptoms from all the fragrance. He said people would smell so strongly, but on the farm, you know, he's just outside all the time in the fresh air. 

00:34:15 Hollie: And then when they go into the city, it would be women wearing very heavy perfumes and stuff and they would all react. So, and that was as a child. So he didn't even have the knowledge to be like, oh, this is not actually like healthy for someone's body. It was just a physical reaction to something that his body was saying, hey, let's move away from that. But I thought that that was really interesting.

00:34:39 Chazmith: Yeah. I mean, it could be just like a little stink conflict, like, oh, this stinks, like that smells. And I can have that happen still. I've learned that long before I ever had any symptoms at all, I never, since I was a kid, I don't know who, I remember somebody in my life used it, but I've never liked the smell of Gain laundry detergent. I think it is the most God-awful, disgusting smell. So if I can still smell that a mile away and I'm like, ugh. But the weirdest thing, call it nostalgia. I'm not going to go buy Tide and I'm not going to use Tide, but there's something really nostalgic about the Tide Fresh Cotton scent that it still appeals to me. 

00:35:25 Chazmith: So I can literally be walking down the street and if somebody's got their dryer going and they used that Fresh Cotton Tide, I can smell it and I'm almost like, it just brings a good memory, a good feeling. But then I walk down by somebody else's house and they use Gain and I'm like, ugh. You know, so– 

00:35:47 Hollie: Yeah, I know what you mean. 

00:35:49 Chazmith: It's both essentially the same thing, but one for me holds a really positive memory and one holds a not-so-great memory, and that impacts how I feel about it.

00:36:00 Hollie: Right. Absolutely. And even just how you feel about everything around you. If you're in a room with fragrance and you really are in a happy environment with the people around you, you could have less potential symptoms than if you're, you know, just in a funk and you're, yeah, it's really interesting.

00:36:20 Chazmith: And also just like how many sprays, like somebody can come into my work and they have like a little bit of fragrance on and I don't even think twice about it, but you know how some people really like to like load it up, they walk in and it feels a little invasive. You're like… And I think that can be for anybody, no matter where we're at, whether or not we've had allergies that came from conflict shocks or not. It could be from somebody who's not ever had any chronic symptoms to somebody who's had a host of allergies to everything.

00:36:49 Hollie: Oh yeah, I didn't actually say, you did ask me this. At the moment of the conflict, I was in an extremely fragrance environment. So plug-ins in almost every outlet, very, very strong perfume, like doused in perfumes, lotions, fragrance, hand soap. Like it was very, very powerful. And so I actually have a really interesting theory that it's possible our bodies are locking on, you know, when they take that screenshot of our environment to keep us safe, it's possible our bodies are more likely to latch onto something that is less natural or naturally harmful. 

00:37:30 Hollie: So when I see so many people having issues with gluten and dairy, it's like, well, you know, why aren't they having a problem with beets if they're like eating beets in front of someone while they're getting yelled at? And I actually, I've never heard anybody else say this, I think it's possible that because gluten and dairy are often a little bit removed from what they would have been hundreds of years ago, right? Our body may be a little bit more likely to latch onto that and say, maybe this is dangerous, maybe this is the dangerous thing. 

00:38:02 Hollie: So I like to, in general, just keep myself in line with nature, a little bit closer to our biological norm. And I find that I feel the best when I do that. And I have the best outlook when I'm doing that, because I'm modeling it for my kids. I could potentially still be an era of, like, having more kids, you know, I want to be in line with the biological norm.

00:38:29 Chazmith: Yeah. Well, two things to that. One, something I actually studied and learned a long time ago was that the brain will latch on to whatever's in vogue. The brain is very aware of what's in vogue, a.k.a. what's believable, what it's getting fed all the time. So the reason why once you see a rise in allergies to, say, gluten or dairy, And then it becomes more and more and more. It's because we're hearing about it more and more and more. So then more often, the brain's going, oh, well, it's hearing all the time that that's dangerous. So then when something happens, and that's in your system, it's like a very natural, believable thing for the brain to latch on to.

00:39:11 Chazmith: It's kind of like this doctor. I'm not sure if you're familiar with him, but his name is Dr. John Sarno. And he really was like a pioneer in discovering mind-body pain and the relationship between like physical pain and like the psyche and the emotional turmoil that was inside of our unconscious. And so he noticed things like back in the day, many, many, many years ago, back when we used to use typewriters, which were really not ergonomically friendly at all, and women would literally work 12 hours a day, and no one had carpal tunnel syndrome, right? But then now all of a sudden, everybody has carpal tunnel syndrome, but we are actually in better positions ergonomically and spending far less time than they used to on typewriters. Well, it's because it became what was in vogue. 

00:39:58 Chazmith: So the brain was like, oh, that must be a great explanation. So it latches on to that. So I think that's how I've always kind of understood it. It's like, well, whatever the brain is getting fed all the time, it's going to assume that's the best, most believable or make the most sense. Like, oh, it must be that because it's learned it over and over again, essentially.

00:40:18 Hollie: Right. It's going to take the least common denominator or the most likely explanation and say, okay, that's a story I can agree with. And then hold on to that story until you actually replace it with a completely different one.

00:40:31 Chazmith: Yeah, yeah, exactly. And yeah, so it's also interesting because I do think a lot of us, we come to realize, oh, it was never the thing outside of us. It was never the chemicals. It was never the fragrance. It was never the dairy. And we might still choose to separate ourselves most of the time from those things but I think the difference is at one point we were probably creating this very small world riddled with fear, so we were very afraid of all these things. 

00:41:02 Chazmith: And the beauty is when we release the fear and we no longer afraid of these things we just have an empowered decision or choice that we make which opens and expands our life again, right? Like you might choose to live mostly holistically and yet you might also make a decision that you're still gonna travel and go stay in a hotel or Airbnb that isn't gonna necessarily be up to the standard that your house might be in terms of holistic living.

00:41:28 Hollie: Right. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I'm wearing earplugs right now, you know? Gotta live. Yeah, I don't know. I used to be really fearful. And I have to say there's still a lot of that in my system. And I still experience symptoms. So there's still a lot for me to work through. Definitely still partway through the journey. But like I mentioned earlier, I'm not stressing about the forward motion. Instead, I'm living, and I'm making sure that my life, my territory, my words are aligning with my actions. I'm really checking in to make sure that I'm making my life what I want it to be, as best as I can, instead of hyper-focusing on scanning my body for like, what's wrong today? which is what I used to do every single day.

00:42:23 Chazmith: Yeah, that's a big difference. A big difference, a totally different place to live from. And it's interesting too because, and maybe you can talk about this, well, it would make sense that you're still growing through this, right? Because it's one thing when something's unconscious, it's a whole nother level when we consciously believe it. Like unconscious belief and now conscious belief, right? So it takes a while to break those down. You know, if you spend six years afraid of mold, afraid of chemicals, afraid of sense, afraid of fragrance, afraid of this, that's a lot to unpack and release and let go of those fears and old beliefs at even a conscious and unconscious level.

00:43:09 Hollie: Right. Yeah. I mean, probably more than most people in the brain rewiring sphere, I do actually like hold that these chemicals and stuff are a hazard. And I know you agree that to some degree, right, they are. But I think having young kids and just thinking back to like living a long time ago where we just weren't inundated with all these things. I really do value living as close to nature as possible. I do value grounding. I do value sunlight. I do value gardening, getting your hands in the dirt. But yeah, there's just a shift happening anywhere before it was like, I'm doing these things because on social media, they said that I have to or else I can never heal. 

00:43:57 Hollie: And you know, that's not a place where you can heal from. And now I'm just working on slowly, slowly integrating those things into my life. from a place of joy where I'm like, okay, do I actually want to be outside right now? I'm not going to force it. I'm not going to force myself to go outside when I don't want to. And I will find a time in my day where it makes sense for me to ground. And I don't know, just getting into hobbies and habits and a lifestyle that is closer to nature, instead of forcing this routine where you're trying to check all these boxes, of what social media says. 

00:44:35 Hollie: Because when you're following a million health accounts and trying to heal, and everybody has their own voice, which is nice, everybody can have their own platform. I enjoy having a platform, it becomes too much noise for a healing brain. And I think that adds to additional conflicts, just like going to too many medical appointments. Too many voices is just the creation of additional shocking conflicts. And they don't even have to be totally shocking. It just has to be something that catches you off guard. And you're like, another thing? Another thing I have to do? Well, that right there may be the cause of your symptoms. It's just another little mini shock of like, I'm not doing enough.

00:45:20 Chazmith: Yeah, suddenly you're feeling overwhelmed because you're overwhelmed by all the things you have to do to heal. It's so funny you brought that up because I literally just last night saw the funniest video on social media of this guy who was actually making fun of the fact that we're like bombarded with all this. And he was like, so I took like all the top health accounts and wellness accounts. And I created your daily agenda for what you need to do to heal and be well. And it starts at like 4am, you know, like get up and did you see this?

00:45:57 Hollie: I saw it, too.

00:45:58 Chazmith: I got to do that. 

00:45:58 Hollie: Did you share it? 

00:46:01 Chazmith: No. 

00:46:01 Hollie: Oh, you didn't share. 

00:46:03 Chazmith: Irene did. 

00:46:03 Hollie: Oh, I watched it on Irene. I love Irene. 

00:46:05 Chazmith: Yes. Oh, my God. Oh, that was so funny. He had like 10,000 things that you had to do. 

00:46:13 Hollie: It was hilarious. 

00:46:14 Chazmith: Your meditation, your cold plunge, your grounding, your this, your this, on and on and on and on every like 15 minutes. Like, I'm going to do this. Now I'm going to do this. 

00:46:23 Hollie: Right. And then good luck getting into a community of people when you're so hyper-focused on getting your cold plunged in and getting all these things in your day. You can't just stop and eat a meal with people anymore.

00:46:39 Chazmith: It was funny. 

00:46:39 Hollie: It was very true. Very eye-opening. I'm like, oh man. Yeah, love it.

00:46:44 Chazmith: But like you said, the difference is, the feeling, it is the why and the drive behind the choice we make to do certain things. So am I doing it because it actually feels good or because I need to check the box? Because again, that's fear. And I've been there, like, Now I know that I want to ground and get sunshine because I truly trust and believe it's good for me. But say one day I do have a migraine and the thought of going out in the sunlight sounds terrible to my head and eyes. 

00:47:14 Chazmith: Well, if I lay there fearful that I'm gonna miss a day of sunshine and grounding and this is terrible for me, how is there any power and healing in that fear? Versus just saying, it's okay. Today, if I stay inside in this dark room and just nurture and love on myself and allow rest and healing because for the last 10 days I got sunshine and grounding and that's okay. It still comes down to the mood, the feeling, and the driving force behind our daily decisions and actions.

00:47:47 Hollie: Right. Yeah. I love the charts that show emotional frequencies. I don't know if you've seen those, but like the absolute lowest frequency that human emotion can emit is fear. And the highest frequency is gratitude. So, and that's probably different on every chart, but on my chart that I look at a lot to help me rewire my thoughts. If I feel fear about something or I'm feeling like critical or angry. Those aren't bad things. It's okay to feel those things, but it's how can I take those emotions and turn them into fuel for higher frequency emotion? Like, okay, I'm feeling really, really afraid about this heart palpitation. I'm feeling like horrible about it. Like what if, what if, what if, what if? 

00:48:33 Hollie: And instead of feeling that fear, I can stop and say, I'm so grateful that my body is speaking to me right now and I know that at the right time, I will have the information I need to figure out why this is happening. And I'm so grateful that I'm able to walk around and enjoy this day with my kids. And oh, there's another heart palpitation. Thank you, body. Thanks for telling me that maybe I'm feeling too overwhelmed right now. You know, you can start to decode these things over time with the help of your friends, with the help of social media, right? It can be a positive resource, too. But yeah, I love thinking of the emotional frequencies.

00:49:13 Chazmith: Yeah, I love that. Yeah, and it's crazy when I'm really curious. Oh, man, it's crazy how much fear is the hidden emotion beneath the emotion that I think I'm feeling, right? Like if you just keep kind of peeling back the layers, it's like almost always fear for me.

00:49:34 Hollie: Yeah, for me, I feel that fear, grief, and anger are the most suppressed and the most hidden and I have to like actually stop to work and go through those ones but the ones that are hidden are usually the ones that are kind of like beat out of you as a child, you know? So that's if it's really deep in you. I found that you can kind of rewire from the back or the front right, so you can go deep diving into memories you can go with a therapist. There's not a wrong way to do it. You can do EMDR, you can do all the different brain rewiring programs, or you can do the front end, which is making those choices to rewire the old wired loops in your brain and just changing who you are now. And you can do both. But yeah, it's really interesting that I think you can have success either way, or both ways, or a combination.

00:50:30 Chazmith: Yeah, I totally agree with that. So knowing that wisdom of GNM, like we've already talked about, it doesn't make you foolproof. It doesn't mean that you're not going to ever have symptoms again or, you know, be conflicted and have stuff show up and sometimes be stumped because something's not necessarily like, you know, it could be in your blind spot still. Is there anything today or lately that you've still been using this wisdom and various tools to work through and heal?

00:50:59 Hollie: I literally love the Learning GNM website. I did have to take a break from it. You kind of mentioned earlier, you know, you can drive yourself mad trying to find your conflict. And for me, the first time it was delivered to me during an epiphany and I've had little moments where, you know, I feel like, wow, that was another GNM success. That's so interesting. Like my daughter was having horrific night terrors and I looked it up and it's a type of territorial conflict. And you know what? I like kindly, but, you know, a little bit forcibly was like, oh yeah, you need to start sleeping in your own room. 

00:51:36 Hollie: And, you know, I just was really like encouraging her to do it instead of giving her her own space to decide when she was ready to move out of our room. And I think that those night terrors were from that, from the territorial, like separation between me and her from not being in a room with her family anymore. And so that was like a really interesting thing. And once we moved her back in, they didn't happen anymore. I wasn't touching her. I wasn't sleeping next door. She was just in the room with us. She was in that territory. And then she ended up eventually deciding to move to her own room. She made the decision without us saying anything and she does not have them anymore. 

00:52:16 Hollie: So I think that's like one little thing. There's also stuff that I like. can't heal. And sometimes that happens, like where you have a conflict, you know what it is, and you also can't resolve it. And so for me, like I shared this on Freya’s podcast, too. Since I moved to Washington, I've had a wart on the bottom of my foot, and it's on my partner's side. So we moved because of his job, and I left my family, and that's really hard. And I think as long as I live here, I may just have it. 

00:52:46 Hollie: And so I've been you know, homeopathy and it goes away, comes right back. And then I've done apple cider vinegar goes away, comes right back, because the conflict is still there. And so, I mean, that doesn't really bother me. Well, it's an expression that I'm on, I'm living on grounds that carries a conflict for me. And it's not a conflict between my husband and I. It's just a conflict that I left. I left my home.

00:53:12 Chazmith: And it's not like it's this major conflict that's going to have major repercussions down the road, you know, because the intensity of the healing phase can mimic the intensity of the conflict phase. So it sounds like it's just like this low-grade little conflict that's– 

00:53:26 Hollie: It's just simmering.

00:53:28 Chazmith: Well, and it's just nice because you can just be like, okay, so I have a little wart, whatever, no big deal. Like it is what it is. You don't have to make, you know, this big thing.

00:53:37 Hollie: And I've absolutely tried to go into the memories of when we left and I really can't identify anything specific. I can't recall any words, phrases, moments, anything. And so I've tried to find truth there. I just don't know where it is. It's a conflict that lies somewhere and maybe it literally just can't be resolved and that's okay. And then the last one is what I'm currently working on. This is a bit vulnerable because it's very, very, a difficult challenge. I, after healing my fragrance allergy, my left nose were so extremely swollen and I started getting a shooting pain in my head, like debilitating, like I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. I thought that my tooth, one of my teeth was like exploding. 

00:54:25 Hollie: Like I thought it was abscessed or, you know, something horrible. I go to nine dentists over the course of a couple of months. I went to Blodgett in Portland. I went to the best two holistic dentists in Seattle. I went all over. They couldn't find anything. My teeth are perfect. And so, you know, of course, send me to endodontist to see if I need a root canal. They send me for imaging, coping scans. I go to the ENT to see if it's a sinus infection because, you know, my lymph nodes are swollen. And no, no, my sinuses are completely clear. They stuck a camera all the way through them. So I'm going on this wild goose chase, which sometimes you literally have to do. 

00:55:04 Hollie: Like I was going holistic, mainstream, whatever I needed to do because it was so debilitating. I basically felt like I was getting lightning strikes to my head. My face started to become asymmetrical. Not like Bell's palsy, but just like the tension in the whole right side of my face was so strong that my face was like literally looking different when I was in flares. And yeah, the pain was just too much to handle. And so I ended up getting diagnosed by a neurologist, a neurosurgeon, and a facial pain specialist with something called trigeminal neuralgia. And then after that, I got diagnosed with neurological Lyme disease. which I don't associate with. I don't know. I can't wear that label. For some reason, my body says, Nope, that's not you. I started taking all the supplements and protocols for Lyme and it just felt wrong. 

00:55:55 Hollie: And so I stopped temporarily. I don't know what I'm doing. And that's the vulnerable part is I literally don't know what I'm doing right now. So then, this is absolutely nuts, I pick up a book called How I Defeated Trigeminal Neuralgia Naturally. It's like the only book about doing this. I'm halfway through the book, I turn the page, and it turns out after going through decades of horrendous pain, multiple suicide attempts, because it's a severe pain disorder. Actually, I don't typically use the word disorder because I think all things are very, very orderly in the body, but severe order of pain to the head. 

00:56:33 Hollie: And so I turned the page in this book, and he goes, you know, how I solved it is something called German New Medicine. And I was like, universe, like, why? Why? Why are you doing this to me? So I'm like, okay, here we go. I'm getting spoonfed the answer again. But here I am, I still don't have an answer. And that's really frustrating when you're raising small children and homeschooling. And trying to run a small business and, you know, supporting your husband, and you're dealing with severe pain, like severe. So I'm still working through that in the book. I'll just share a tidbit of what he did. He opened a pizza oven, and the heat hit the side of his face. And it felt like he got struck by lightning basically, like fell to the ground. 

00:57:20 Hollie: And it usually, people pull out multiple teeth before getting their diagnosis because the nerves kind of like trick your brain into thinking that it's your teeth. So he didn't know what it was, right? And after all these decades of treating it, getting multiple brain surgeries, he figured out that the pizza oven, the heat was a track. And when he was a child, he tripped and fell on a stove and sliced his head open. And it was in the middle of the night, he woke up to get something. And so he sliced his head open, had to go to the ER. So he went to wake up his mom. And his mother slapped him across the face for waking her up. 

00:58:03 Hollie: And so the slap and the heat of the oven was triggered literally decades later in his life and re-invited that conflict and said, okay, here we go. It's time to deal with it. Buckle up, right? So he was able to get relief of 80% of his symptoms and become fully functional just through German New Medicine. But then he also had to do a lot of other things. He had to cut gluten. He had to, I don't know what else he did. He detoxed mercury. I don't remember.

00:58:33 Chazmith: He probably developed a lot of triggers on that track along the way.

00:58:37 Hollie: Right. And also, Like I said before, I'm hybrid here. So I'm not like 100%, like everything GNM is like total truth. I use it as like a roadmap. And I'm sure year by year, I'll like totally change what I think about this. But basically, I also think that things like mercury fillings, like it's super interesting. I had mercury fillings, and he did, too. And he had heel pain and I have heel pain, too. There's like little things where it was like our symptoms are like just a complete mirror, right? 

00:59:07 Hollie: Except I've never been slapped in the face, so it's not going to be that easy for me to figure out. Yeah, so I'm sorting through. I've gone through many memories. I've gone through memories of what happened the day that I got my first flare. I can't find anything. I've gone through what my husband and I were going through because it's on a partner side at that time. We were going through the most simple time in our marriage. We actually have like pretty easy marriage, but the vaccine mandates were really putting a strain on us because he was going to lose his job. So that was happening at that time. So that could have something to do with it.

00:59:40 Chazmith: That could feel like a smack on the face.

00:59:43 Hollie: Right. Yeah, it could feel like a smack on the face when after everything I'd gone through, and I was so, so like strung up about toxins, right? And, you know, following all the social media accounts were like, you know, this vaccine is the worst thing that you could possibly do for him to say something like, oh, I think I might actually have to get it or else, you know, we're gonna be homeless, you know? Like, he's like, what choice do I have. Every job that is in my field, I'll have to get this. So I might as well do it. 

01:00:13 Hollie: And that could have felt like a slap, but yet I have gone through and tried to rewire that. I don't remember any phrases. And so I just trust right now that my symptoms, they're nerve symptoms. Even that feels like my brain is exploding sometimes, literally. I trust that they are there to serve me and that they are a gift. And that doesn't mean that I'll eliminate the possibility of like taking pain relief at some point, because sometimes it is too much. But I trust that I don't have the answer that I need yet for some reason. And maybe that'll come to me today, right here, right now. Or maybe it'll be a year or five years. And I'll keep looking, but like my body cannot afford for me to stress about it. So yeah, that's where I'm at now.

01:01:02 Chazmith: So it sounds though that you're approaching this with a really different mindset and energy than how you originally approached your healing for the allergy to the sense.

01:01:15 Hollie: Right. So here's what I'm thinking is that this happened a month after, right? I feel like that's pretty weird. It almost feels like an onion, right? Where one layer got peeled off. and this is what was underneath and I didn't have what it took to face whatever this is at that time. And so that first layer had to come off for this one to present itself and so I know I'll figure it out. I think that's the cool part is I'm like, yeah, I know. I know I won't be like this forever like I just know. But yeah, it's definitely I have days that are really really hard and I don't know, I appreciate it somehow. Not the pain, but I feel like I have so much purpose right now because of it. 

01:01:58 Hollie: And that one day when I figure it out, I'll also be able to write a book report, podcast, share with my audience on Instagram what I did. And I know I've already come to learn a lot in a year and a half about trigeminal neuralgia, and I've already helped many people. And so one day when I'm healed, I know that. Well, one day when I'm healed, right? I always have to rephrase my language here. I'm currently already healing. The trigeminal neuralgia is the healing. One day when I'm no longer experiencing healing from whatever happened, then I'll be able to share what happened that created that conflict.

01:02:35 Chazmith: Yeah. I love your reframe. 

01:02:37 Hollie: Thank you. 

01:02:39 Chazmith: You're welcome. I have no doubts that you will also figure it out yourself. 

01:02:43 Hollie: Thank you. Yeah. 

01:02:45 Chazmith: Yeah, it's very obvious. And the fact that you're holding the energy around it that you're holding is, it's good. It's healthy. It feels like lighter. It's hard to do, so congratulations to be able to hold that energy because it's hard to stay in that space and stay faithful and appreciative and grateful and confident when we're in the thick of it. Sometimes I think that people listening might be listening to someone talk who's already on the other side, and it can be like, oh, easy for you to say you're already over there but to be able to hold that space while you're still here is so different.

01:03:24 Hollie: Right I'm in the thick of it and that's okay. I just trust that it's meant to be.

01:03:31 Chazmith: Yeah. Well, thank you for sharing all of that with us.

01:03:34 Hollie: Thank you for listening and holding space for all those stories.

01:03:38 Chazmith: Yeah. Yeah. No, I appreciate you. And I'm sure that it will really support somebody out there who's listening, who's maybe in the same, you know, situation or the same space or going through something similar. It's a really good perspective, you know, and a good insight for people to hear and take in.

01:03:55 Hollie: Yeah. Yeah. If anybody listening has something to say, they can message me. So feel free to DM me if anything I said resonates.

01:04:05 Chazmith: Yeah, thank you so much. I'll definitely link your account so people have a way to get in touch with you. I want to ask you one more question. It's a question that I ask every guest at the end of the episode. And that is that if you were told that you could only spend the rest of your life sharing one message, what message would you want to spend the rest of your life sharing with the world? And I'm going to preface that because you have a child. Whenever somebody has a child, I really love for them to think if you could only share one message for the rest of your life to your child, what message would you impart into him or her?

01:04:43 Hollie: I would say that you're not broken. You're 100% functional. Every single person is.

01:04:52 Chazmith: Good. Thank you. Thank you so much for coming on and joining me today and sharing your story and even your, you know, story of what you're currently going through. I know it is so hard enough to be vulnerable and share things we've gone through, let alone things we are currently going through. So I appreciate you and I know it will absolutely be of service to somebody who is tuned in.

01:05:13 Hollie: Yeah. Thank you so much. I really enjoyed talking.

01:05:21 Chazmith: Alright, that is a wrap and as always with every episode, you know that I hope that you are in some way inspired or that you walk away with something new that you learned, a practical insight or tool that you can implement into your healing experience. This is the end of November and we are moving into December, you guys, the last month of the year. That is so bananas. 

01:05:48 Chazmith: I hope that you have all had a wonderful month of Thanksgiving and gratitude, and I hope that no matter where you are at in your journey that you are able over this next month to find time for self-care, for peace, for solitude, for reflection, for just loving on yourself, for regulation, and for finding the good in each moment because I know for some of us the holidays can be so hard and I'm with you in thoughts and prayers. Until next time, make this week great.